why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize