That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
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i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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