The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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