one might say we're banned from that church
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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