Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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