if i died would you start the facebook group?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
