It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
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if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
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I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?