Just fell off a train. Bad.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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