He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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