Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize