She said her name was "party"
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Duck Duck Cougar?
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Randomize
