He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize