the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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