well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Barsexuality is the new black.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize