my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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