She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
