why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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