you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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