He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Randomize
