ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
