I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
My life is pants optional.
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