You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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