Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
wow bdsm is so cute
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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