Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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