but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
