They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
