Ambien. No doubt about it.
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
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