Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Randomize
