see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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