Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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