This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
