dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Randomize
