Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
