Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
