So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
