with your own penis?
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
