Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
