If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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