Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(513): View more from Ohio

I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.

(1-513): View more from Ohio

trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.

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(630): View more from Illinois

just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea

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(913): View more from Kansas

Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..

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(912): View more from Georgia

I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her

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These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
Read it at the TFLN blog
(757): View more from Virginia

I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.

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(519): View more from Ontario

It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.

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(509): View more from Washington

We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.

(1-509): View more from Washington

You had me at shuffleboard and strippers

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(480): View more from Arizona

And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.

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