My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I have aggressive nipples.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
