nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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