would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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