It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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