Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
