Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
