Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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