Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".