just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
