Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
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