I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Randomize
