is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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